有关幽默风趣的英语小故事27篇

无论是身处学校还是步入社会，大家都不可避免地会接触到小故事吧，下面是小编收集整理的有关幽默风趣的英语小故事，希望能够帮助到大家。

A bank robber stole a lot of money. He was caught and sent to prison, but the money was never found. When he came out of prison, they watched him to see what he would do. Here is the detective, reporting to the inspector. "Yes, sir, I found Johnny . I followed him all around the town, but frankly, I couldnt make anything out of what he bought. Heres the list."

shirt , heavycrowbar, box of chocolates , shovel, heavy hammer, bunch of flowers .The inspector said, "Good. That helps me a lot. Do you remember how we watched him helping his neighbour, old Mrs. Judson to cover her backyard with cement?

The City Mouse and the Country Mouse Once there were two mice. They were friends. One mouse lived in the country; the other mouse lived in the city. After many years the Country mouse saw the City mouse; he said,"Do e and see me at my house in the country." So the City mouse went. The City mouse said,"This food is not good,and your house is not good. Why do you live in a hole in the field? You should e and live in the city. You would live in a nice house made of stone. You would have nice food to eat. You must e and see me at my house in the city." The Country mouse went to the house of the City mouse.

It was a very good house. Nice food was set ready for them to eat. But just as they began to eat they heard a great noise. The City mouse cried," Run! Run! The cat is ing!" They ran away quickly and hid.

After some time they came out. When they came out,the Country mouse said,"I do not like living in the city. I like living in my hole in the field. For it is nicer to be poor and happy,than to be rich and afraid."

A rich woman is so proud of a valuable antique vase that she decides to have her bedroom painted the same colour as the vase. Several painters try to mix the colour right,but none comes close enough to satisfy the woman.

Eventually,a painter comes. He is confident that he can mix the proper colour. The woman is pleased with the result,and the painter becomes famous.

Years later,he retires and turns the business over to his son. ”Dad,”asks the son,”there’s something Ive got to know. How did you get those walls to match the vase so perfectly?"

"Son,” the father replies,"I painted the vase."

Who have a valuable antique vase？

Jack had gone to the university to study history, but at the end of his first year, his history professor failed him in his examinations, and he was told that he would have to leave the university. However, his father decided that he would go to see the professor to urge him to let Jack continue his studies the following year.

"He‘s a good boy," said Jack‘s father, "and if you let him pass this time, I‘m sure he‘ll improve a lot next year and pass the examinations at the end of it really well."

"No, no, that‘s quite impossible," replied the professor immediately. "Do you know, last month I asked him when Napoleon had died, he didn‘t know!"

"Please, sir, give him another chance," said Jack‘s father. "You see, I‘m afraid we don‘t take any newspaper in our house, so none of us even know that Napoleon was ill."

The miser and his gold Once upon a time there was a miser.

He hid his gold under a tree. Every week he used to dig it up.

One night a robber stole all the gold. When the miser came again,he found nothing but an empty hole.

He was surprised,and then burst into tears.All the neighbors gathered around him.

He told them how he used to e and visit his gold.

"Did you ever take any of it out?" asked one of them. "No," he said,"I only came to look at it." "Then e again and look at the hole," said the neighbor,"it will be the same as looking at the gold."

Billy hare is hungry and finds a radish. What he picks it up, Mr. Fox is behind him and wants to eat him. “I’m hungry, too. You’re my dinner. I’m going to eat you,” he says.

Billy Hare is shocked, but he isn’t scared. He says, “Follow me. I have better food for you.”

They go to a well.

“Look down here,” Billy Hare says “There is something in the water. “What’s that?” Mr. Fox asks surprisingly. “It’s a big and fat hen. Let’s get down and fetch it.” Billy Hare says and gets down with a pail.

“Can you out the hen into the pail?” Mr. Fox shouts. “No. She’s too big,” Billy Hare says, “Come down, please. We can take her up together. Jump into the other pail.”

Mr. Fox does so. When he gets down, Billy Hare gets up. “Good-bye!” Billy Hare gets out of the well and says. Mr. Fox can’t get out.

On a vacation trip,Duke Huan of the state of Qi came to the ruin of the capital of Guo Shi,which perished long ago.

Seeing the desolate and bleak prospects of broken tiles,collapsed walls,and clusters of weeds,he could not help asking the local people about the reason of the ruin of Guo Shi.

They replied,"Guo Shi was fond of doing good deeds,and averse to

evildoing,which led to the perdition."

When the Duke could not understand the answer,people explained,"

Though he liked doing good,he had never been able to do so; though he hated evildoing,never could he help not participating. That caused the ruin of his boat had moved but the sword had not. Isnt this a very foolish way to look for a sword?

A man was going to the house of some rich person. As he went along the road, he saw a box of good apples at the side of the road. He said, “I do not want to eat those apples; for the rich man will give me much food; he will give me very nice food to eat.“ Then he took the apples and threw them away into the dust.

He went on and came to a river. The river had become very big; so he could not go over it. He waited for some time; then he said, “I cannot go to the rich man”s house today, for I cannot get over the river.“

He began to go home. He had eaten no food that day. He began to want food. He came to the apples, and he was glad to take them out of the dust and eat them.

Do not throw good things away; you may be glad to have them at some other time.

good afternoon,everyone.today,my topic is “i want to be free.”it’s a story about a wolf and a dog.

a wolf was almost dead with hunger.a house-dog saw him,and asked,”friend,it’s bad for you.”

“why don’t you work steadily as i do,and get your food regularly?” “i would have no objection.”said the wolf,”if i could only get a place.” “i will help you.”said the dog.”e with me to my master,and you shall share me work ”

so the wolf and the dog went to the town together.

on the way,the wolf saw that there was no hair around the dog’neck. he felt quite surprised,and asked him why it was like that? “oh,it is nothing.”said the dog.”every night my master puts a collar around my neck and chains me up.you will soon get used to it.”

“is that the only reason.”said the wolf.”then good bye to you,my friend.i would like to be free.”

do you like to be free?every.thank you for listening.

The wolf and the fox want to eat the rabbit, but it wasnt easy to catch him.

One day the wolf says to the fox, "You go home and lie in bed. Ill tell the rabbit that you are dead. When he comes to look at you, you can jump up and catch him." Thats a good idea," says the fox.

The fox goes home at once. The wolf goes to the rabbits house and knocked at the door. "Who is it?" asks the rabbit. "Its the wolf. I come to tell you that the fox is dead." Then the wolf goes away.

The rabbit goes to the foxs house. He looked in through the window and sees the fox lying in bed with his eyes closed. He thinks, "Is the fox really dead or is he pretending to be dead? If hes not dead, hell catch me when I go near him." so he said, "The wolf says that the fox is dead. But he doesnt look like a dead fox. The mouth of a dead fox is always open." When the fox hears this, he thinks, "Ill show him that Im dead." So he opened his mouth.

The rabbit knows that the fox isnt dead, and he rans away quickly.

One day the king of animals asked a cat to see how his palace was built. After a few hours, the little cat came back and said to the tiger, “Oh, your palace is very large, tall and beautiful. ”Several days later the tiger asked a pig to see it. He said, “Go and see how my palace is built. ”But when the pig came back, he said to the tiger, “My dear king, I thought your palace is beautiful, but it suits yourself only. ”

The tiger was very surprised when he heard it. “Why are the cat’s and the pig’s answers not the same? ”he said to himself. He then asked a camel to go to have a look. Before long the camel ran back out of breath and said to the tiger, “Oh, your palace is too small for you to live in, my king. ”

The king became very angry when he heard what the camel said. He said to the animals angrily, “Maybe somebody of you tell lies. Three people have three ideas. I want to kill you. ”Just at the moment, a fox came out to stop the tiger from doing that. He asked the tiger himself to go to see it before killing them.

After the tiger saw the palace himself, he thought that their answers were all right. He said to the animals, “To see with one’s own eyes is more important than only to hear others. ”

One day, a monkey rides his bike near the river.

This time he sees a lion under a tree. The lion runs at him. He is afraid and falls into the river. He can’t swim. He shouts.

The rabbit hears him. He jumps into the river. The rabbit swims to the monkey, but he can’t help him.

Luckily, an elephant comes along. He is very strong. He helps the rabbit and monkey. Three friends are very happy. They go to the elephant’s home. Then, three of them become good friends.

When I was a child,I once went camping with my family in the summer. We decided to make a barbecue in the valley. So we collected some tree sticks to make a fire. My father asked me if I could try to make a fire. I was glad to take the job. Then I tried to set fire to the wood with a match,but produced only smoke. Then my father said,”Thats not the right way.

I’ll show you how to do it. First use the small pieces of wood because they catch fire easily. Then put the larger ones on top of them.”My father helped me make a big fire.

A rich woman is so proud of a valuable antique vase that she decides to have her bedroom painted the same colour as the vase. Several painters try to mix the colour right, but none comes close enough to satisfy the woman.

Eventually, a painter comes. He is confident that he can mix the proper colour. The woman is pleased with the result, and the painter becomes famous. Years later, he retires and turns the business over to his son. "Dad,"asks the son, "theres something Ive got to know. How did you get those walls to match the vase so perfectly?"

"Son,” the father replies, "I painted the vase."

Now there was a man who stole a chicken from his neighbor every day.

"This is not the way a man of moral principles should behave," he was told.

"Well, then I will reduce the number," he replied, "I’ll steal one every month and next year I wont steal any more." Since he knew he was doing something wrong, he ought to stop at once. Why wait till next year

When my wife,Diana, and I met a new couple at church one Sunday, we stopped to introduce ourselves and to exchange pleasantries.

We described the friendly neighborhood we lived in,and listened sympathetically as they lamented that theirs was just the opposite.

Saying our good-byes, we got in our cars and drove home.

As we approached our house,we were horrified to see that our new-found friends were pulling into the driveway next to ours.

Very Pleased to Meet You

During World War II, a lot of young women in Britain were in the army. Joan Phillips was one of them. She worked in a big camp, and of course met a lot of men, officers and soldiers.

One evening she met Captain Humphreys at a dance. He said to her, "I‘m going abroad tomorrow, but I‘d be very happy if we could write to each other." Joan agreed, and they wrote for several months.

Then his letters stopped, but she received one from another officer, telling her that he had been wounded and was in a certain army hospital in England.

Joan went there and said to the matron, "I‘ve come to visit Captain Humphreys."

"Only relatives are allowed to visit patients here," the matron said.

"Oh, that‘s all right," answered Joan. "I‘m his sister."

"I‘m very pleased to meet you," the matron said, "I‘m his mother!"

Washington was the first president of the U.S. He was very clever even when he was still a 12-year-old-boy.

Once a thief stole some money from Uncle Post, Washingtons neighbor. The door of the house was not broken, and things in the room were in good order. Washington concluded that the thief must have been committed by one of the villagers.

That evening at the villagers meeting the said, "We dont know who stole the money but God does. God sends his wasp to tell good from evil. Every night the wasp flies among us but few people notice it…" Then, all of a sudden Washington waved his hand and cried out, "Look! The wasp has landed on the thiefs hat. It is going to sting!"

The crowd burst into an uproar. Everybody turned to look for the thief. But soon the noise died down. All eyes were fixed on a man who was trying hard to drive the "Wasp" off his hat.

"Now we know who stole the money," Washington said with a smile.

Donny is my little brother. He is a naughty boy.

On Sunday morning Donny went into the yard and played with a dog. Sometimes a bird would come down to stay on the tops of the dogs house. Then Donny threw a stone at it. Suddenly the little boy began crying. Mother ran to Donny and asked him what was wrong. He said, "Ivebroken sisters plate. She has beaten me." "Why?" "I threw it at a bird, and it went straight to the plate."

Such was my naughty brother.

One time, a mountain happened a big earthquake, vibration sounds like a loud moan and shout. Many people gathered

At the foot of the mountain to watch, do not know what had happened. While they were assembled in anxious, worried about seeing something bad omen, only

Saw a mouse running from the mountain.

Dont make much ado about nothing.

Weak forces of good, evil away to heaven by. Asked Zeus is good at, how can we return to earth to. Zeus told

He, you dont go, one of the worlds visit. Evil and people very close, so continuously to find him

Are. Good because down from the sky, on the very slow to very slow.

That is to say, people is not easy to meet good, but every day of the injury or harm.

Prometheus created man, and in each of them hanging round her neck has two pockets, a pack the faults of others, the other

Of their own equipment. He put the loaded others faults pocket hanging in the chest, the other is hanging behind his back. Hence it is that men are

Quick to see the faults of others, and their total however invisible.

This story explained that people often like to find fault with others, but ignore their shortcomings.

An old dog young and strong never yielded to any beast of the forest, the elderly, in a hunting, met a

Wild boar, he bravely rushed to bite pig ears. Because of his dental aging weakness, not snapped, wild boar

Run away. Master came running greatly disappoint ones hopes, give him a meal. Old dogs raised his head and said:" master ah! This cannot be

Blame me not. My brave spirit and the youth are the same, but I cant resist the natural law. I used to act by

Your praise, it should not be your blame."

That is to say, the birth and death is the inexorable law.

Summer, other animal have a leisurely life, only the ants run around in the fields to collect, wheat and barley, give yourself a

Winter food storage. Surprised todung beetle asked him why he was so diligent. Ant at the time said nothing.

Winter came, a heavy rain washed cow dung, dung beetle hungry, where ant went begging, ants said to him:" hey,

Buddy, if at the time when I work, you not criticize me, but also to work, we would not have the hungry."

It is said that, despite the changing situation, the people can avoid disaster save.

A lawyer opened the door of his BMW, when suddenly a car came along and hit the door, ripping it off completely. When the police arrived at the scene, the lawyer was complaining bitterly about the damage to his precious BMW.

"Officer, look what theyve done to my Beeeemer!!!", he whined.

"You lawyers are so materialistic, you make me sick!!!" retorted the officer, "Youre so worried about your stupid BMW, that you didnt even notice that your left arm was ripped off!!!"

A man wrote a letter to a small hotel he planned to visit on his vacation: "I would very much like to bring my dog with me. He is well-groomed and very well behaved. Would you be willing to permit me to keep him in my room with me at night?"

An immediate reply came from the hotel owner, who said, "Ive been operating this hotel for many years. In all that time, Ive never had a dog steal towels, bedclothes, silverware or pictures off the walls. Ive never had to evict a dog in the middle of the night for being drunk and disorderly. And Ive never had a dog run out on a hotel bill. Yes, indeed, your dog is welcome at my hotel. And, if your dog will vouch for you, youre welcome to stay here, too."

A bank robber stole a lot of money. He was caught and sent to prison,but the money was never found. When he came out of prison,they watched him to see what he would do. Here is the detective,reporting to the inspector. ”Yes,sir,I found Johnny . I followed him all around the town,but frankly,I couldnt make anything out of what he bought. Here’s the list."

shirt,heavy crowbar,box of chocolates,shovel,heavy hammer,bunch of flowers .The inspector said,”Good. That helps me a lot. Do you remember how we watched him helping his neighbour,old Mrs. Judson to cover her backyard with cement?

【幽默风趣的英语小故事】